2 Pretentious Gringos: Wichita, Kansas

For the past 13 years of marriage, Karl and I have but one area of life that we are aware of and yet fully embrace pretentiousness: Mexican food. We're Texans, which geographically means we are better judges than most of our fellow Americans, and we have high standards. We never voluntarily eat at a national chain Mexican Food restaurant. Not even _____? You may ask. No. [In compliance with my own personal boundary of not bad-mouthing anyone on the internet, I will refrain from names. But you can fill in the blank with your favorite chain Mexican restaurant, and our answer will remain the same. ;)]  And so because of our mutual affinity and pretenses, one of our favorite marital hobbies is to visit small, locally owned restaurantes de Mexico and rate them on a scale of 1-5 in 6 different categories. We always order the same thing, as to truly compare experiences. Hubs tries the beef taco dinner, with rice & beans, while I sample the enchiladas, also with rice & beans. We have concurred that regardless of what a restaurant is "known for", if they can't make a good taco and enchilada, they should not be an esteemed Mexican food restaurant.
We've kept notes in our larger-than-lap-size road atlas as we toured the country on missions, and we dreamed of one day writing the all-time most exhaustively complete guide to Mexican Food! Well, technology has advanced beyond our notes...beyond books, printed restaurant guides, and even the road atlas, so we decided to pick up here and now, chronicling our samplings on this here internet. :)

Wichita, Kansas: Connie's Mexico Cafe

Chips & Salsa = 3 stars
Tacos = 3 stars
Enchiladas = 4 stars
Rice & Beans = 5 stars
Freshness = 5 stars
Ambiance & Cleanliness = 4 stars

Mean Score = 4 stars
North of the Red River 1/2 point bonus 
Total Score = 4.5 stars!

Price = $8-$12 pp = Good Value Stamp of Approval

Commentary: Connie's is a family-owned business that has spanned generations, making it the longest-lasting Mexican food establishment in Wichita. Their sweet story and family pictures don the menu and walls, making you feel like a part of something special. The host provides you with both mild and hot salsa in generous portions. While the mild sauce's flavor resembles marinara, the hot was excellent--full of fresh cilantro and large chunks of jalepeño. Hubs said because of the plentiful supply and superb hot version, we would still give this a good score. The average restaurant-style bagged chip held the score at 3.
Connie's had an excellent freshness to its food--no canned chili on the top of enchiladas, but instead a flavorful homemade chorizo sauce. Whole pinto beans for Karl, refried beans for me--both flavorful and not tasting of a can, and some of the best Spanish rice we've ever had--an amazing fluffy texture and authentic flavor of tomatoes and peppers, not a hint of a boxed sauce. Karl's tacos were unique in that they were served in a fried flour tortilla--this too tasted like it had just come out of the deep fryer. The ground beef, also fresh, contained what looked like frozen hashbrowns, which Karl didn't care for because it lessened the flavor and freshness, thereby bumping down his taco score slightly.

And as the bonus indicates, we were impressed to find such quality Mexican Food north of the Red River. Good job, Connie's! If we pass through Wichita, we will visit again! On second trips, we branch out and try other things, their famous gigante burritos which we saw on platters of happy patrons will be our next choice!
  

Sweet Pea's Story

My middle child, my Sweet Pea, the one whose boisterous laughter delights everyone in her company, the one whose pensive introversion makes this momma scratch my head in prayer for help to minister to her heart. While my firstborn wears her heart on her face before verbally expressing every thought and feeling she possesses (making my role as nurturer, disciplinarian, and shepherd fairly easy to navigate) my Sweet Pea flees the scene at the first engagement of her emotional muscles. Tucking herself in a tiny ball within her bottom bunk, she grips "snuggly blanket," the obvious name for her favorite item of security. I stroke her hair and whisper reassurances to her. Rarely does she respond with words; occasionally a purr. Inwardly I pray for God to reveal to me what her heart needs in order to experience love and security. I pray that He would give me words to build her up, but mostly that she would eventually run to Him instead of "snuggly."

We talk about Jesus a lot in this house. We thank Him, we ask Him for help, we discuss His teaching. Big sister has "asked Him in her heart," which has added a whole new dimension to conversations during the last 2 years; the Holy Spirit is also mentioned frequently. Because of this, I wonder even more what goes on in my Sweet Pea's mind. We pray together as a family at breakfast--each one of us takes a turn around the table and thanks God for His blessings that are near to our heart that day, and each asks Him for help in whatever areas are weighing on our minds that day. At dinner, we pray for others--family, friends, missionaries. When we take turns, Sweet Pea asks to not participate 90% of the time. She doesn't want to pray aloud. She doesn't want to pray at all. We don't make her. I know from years of college ministry that children have to make their own personal decision of faith at their own time, and that pushing them to follow our faith will generally lead to 1 of 2 possible outcomes: insincere faith that is performance driven, or active rebellion from not only things spiritual, but of all things that parents teach. So we don't push. What is going on in her little heart? Are we doing something to make her turned off to God? We pray more.

Karl and I pray daily together, separately, and inwardly over her that "God would soften her heart to Himself, and reveal her heart to us." At age four, she is asking questions about personal faith. As we wade into conversations about it, she shuts them down, hops off, and clutches "snuggly." We let her--we don't push. Her teachers at church approach us to say that she knows every answer, and not just the obvious answers. When asked, "What is Noah known for?" She doesn't say, "Building the ark." She says, "He obeyed God." Wow. Grasping the deeper concepts is evidence of heart-level comprehension. Is she actually warm to God, but shy to express it to us? Why is she shy around us--does she not feel secure? We pray more.

On an October morning, (her age = 4 and three-quarters), we have a discipline session. A fairly routine display of rebellion--yelling hateful words at her brother, followed by a fairly routine consequence and "talkin-to"--(as we call it in Texas), where I lay out what was wrong and why, what is correct, and what God's word tells us about the situation. Sometimes in these instances, she wants me to read directly from the Bible. We may read a verse or two about love, but we usually end up viewing the 10 commandments illustration in the picture Bible--"Honor your father and mother." And always after a 10 commandments reading, I explain that God knew that no one can keep all 10 commandments. I reassure her that I do not expect her to be perfect, that I am not perfect, and that God knows this, and that's why He sent Jesus, who was perfect, to take our punishment for us. Sometimes this will launch her into wanting to read a story about Jesus. (You can see why it takes me a while to get my laundry done). On this October morning, she so desired. When we get to the end of the Jesus story, the part about what He did for us on the cross, and how we must accept this payment for ourselves, she outwardly shuts down once more. She walks away. In the calm, I sensed the Holy Spirit's whisper, "You don't have to push, but sometimes, your job as parent is to lay it all out for her."

In obedience, I called her back. I said, "Sweet Pea, I've read this story to you a hundred times, but do you know that there's more to the story? You see this page where there are 3 crosses? Jesus is on the cross in the middle, but you see these 2 other guys? They have a story too--do you want to hear it?" She nods, and climbs back into my lap. I relay the criminals' stories--how they both had done terrible things--things that deserved the worst punishment. I told her, "One of them didn't believe in Jesus; he said mean things to Jesus, and he died having never asked for forgiveness. But the other man admitted that Jesus was the True King. He said he was sorry and asked for forgiveness and Jesus forgave him, even though he was a criminal! And He said, 'Today you will be with me in paradise.'" I finished by saying to her, "Sweet Pea, everyone has a choice in life." I decided to leave it at that, and put the book on the shelf. She urgently ran back to get it, protesting, "Mommy, Mommy!" Then she leaned in to whisper, "I want to be the other guy."

We had a conversation about what that means, and I prayed aloud for her. I asked her what she was feeling and if she wanted to put her trust in Jesus. She said, "Mommy, I already opened the door while you prayed." Uncertain, I asked, "What does that mean?" She glowingly smiled, "I asked Jesus to clean my heart." I smiled at her sweet expression--all her own! She jumped up and down and called her sister eagerly, "Sissy, sissy, I opened the door to Jesus and asked Him to clean my heart!!" Such enthusiasm from our little one who curls in a ball in her bunk!

The next day, we had a "Breakfast with Angels"--a tradition we started a couple of years ago to celebrate when someone dear to us surrenders their life to Christ and joins the family of God. We presented her with a devotional Bible and a cross necklace of real gold to signify her life-changing decision.

That day, and for days following, she thrust her hand in the air when I asked for a volunteer to pray aloud. One morning she prayed, "Thank you for food and water and that Daddy has a job, and for Christmas and for Jesus, and that we are free to worship." All her own words and thoughts! Wow! What a testimony to "new life in Christ!" She has softened her heart to God, made a genuine decision of faith, and shares her heart openly with us = multiple answers to prayer!


Today, 6 months later, she is still not perfect, of course. She still breaks a commandment. But now when she is feeling hurt, shy, or mad because she received a reprimand, she runs into her bottom bunk and clutches her Bible. Rolled tight into a little ball, she snuggles the book. She remains true to her personality of using less words to express her feelings, but it is obvious from her actions that a change has occurred in her heart. Instead of finding security and hope in her "snuggly blanket," she now finds it in God's word. And we pray. We pray that it will remain there.

Living Missionally: Lights in a Dark World

A college mentor of mine challenged our group of 20-somethings: "See the world through a different lens, a lens from which God sees, one that detects light from dark." Imagine that if looking through infrared goggles..(think war movies-- Those goggles where everything looks green except when something has body temperature, then it's appears red. Embarrassingly I'll admit that I'm picturing the Schwarzenegger movie Predator) looking through these goggles, the entire world is dark--your neighborhood, your street--it's pitch black, until you, a believer in Christ--a creation filled with God's light--moves in. Now on a once dark street, a light glows from within a house. It is dim but inviting, and as it moves beyond its doors of confinement, it pierces. Darkness is affected by light. When you interact with someone still in darkness, it is significant. "The light shines in the darkness, and the darkness cannot comprehend it." (John chapter 1).

Our mentor added to the challenge: "Now write down everyone with whom you come in contact this week." She passed out pocket-sized notebooks while continuing, "The person you sit next to in class, the girls who live on your hall, the person who swipes your card in the dining hall, the cashier at Walmart, EVERYONE."
Over the course of the semester, we kept track of where our "light" touched. We began praying for those people, especially the ones who repeatedly crossed our paths. We looked for ways to intentionally share the love of Jesus with our actions, as well as share the message of Jesus with our words. The experience has forever changed my perspective.
Now a stay-at-home mom of 3, my interactions look a lot different. When I go through the grocery line, I try to pacify one kid in the buggy seat, keep the other two from pulling off goodies that hang at tot eye-level, all the while unloading and reloading an overflowing shopping cart and managing a series of coupons both paper and digital. It is hard for me to focus on the person who is possibly in the darkness on the other side of the check-out. But when I do, when I stop focusing on the frustrations of long-lines and many distractions, God not only uses me to impact someone, He does something else amazing: He changes ME. In that moment, He chips away another piece of my selfishness.
Through a series of several shopping trips, I recently built a rapport with a cashier who is about my age and a mommy of 2. One Fall day, we chatted about our kids and Halloween costumes, and she mentioned how she really wanted to buy her son a costume that their store had for sale, but her husband didn't want her to spend $20 on a costume so they would have to make something, but she said longingly, "I know he'd just be SO CUTE in it."
After she rang up my items, I said, "I'll take a $20 gift card please." Once I paid, I handed her the gift card and said, "Here, this is for you. Go buy your son that costume."
Her jaw dropped with shock. With blushing cheeks and a wide grin she shook her head and said, "I can't accept this."
I said, "No really, I want you to have it! God bless you!"
She took my gift with a smile and a thanks. The lady behind me in line chased after me in the parking lot to say, "You just made her day! She was absolutely gushing!" And of course, the experience had made MY day because joy is found when I live out God's purpose for life! A significant exchange of light occurred that day, and one that she will hopefully associate with God's love until bit by bit the light she experiences spells out Jesus' message to her.

Karl and I are leading our Bible Fellowship class at church through a monthly series on Living Missionally, and this month's focus is on listening and meeting "felt needs" of those around us. Jesus did this throughout His ministry on earth--He fed the hungry, healed the sick, restored sight to the blind, and so on. In our world of modern comfort, most people seem like they don't need much, but even those with big houses and full bellies have needs, most are like Zacchaeus--they need a friend. This month, please join us in living missionally by meeting someone's need in the name of Jesus, and lighting up a little more of the world.

Talk About Pop Music

Some people discuss great poetry, my kids and I discuss pop music...
This week, we've navigated the subject why Taylor Swift never ever ever wants to get back together with that boy:
Me: "Well, she said that he picked fights with her, and he said he was sorry and he'd change, but he didn't change. He kept doing the same thing. Does that boy sound like a wise man or a foolish man?
3 backseat voices in unison: "FOOLISH!"(We've been categorizing traits of Wise vs. Foolish from Proverbs for more than a year).

Me: "So it's important to forgive him, but he is not the kind of man that she should give her heart to."
Oldest daughter: "She should be with a boy who loves Jesus."
Me: "Absolutely. And if he doesn't love Jesus and doesn't have the Holy Spirit, he can't really change. Only God changes hearts. He can try and try on his own, but just like us, without Jesus, we can't have the fruits of the Spirit-- love, joy, peace, patience, kindness..."
Kids join in: "Goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Galatians 5:22 and 23a. A-A-A-A!" (They like to repeat and shout the "A" together when they finish reading a Beary Patch Bears Book).
Second Daughter: "So she should never ever EVER get back together with him!"

Let me give kudos to Taylor Swift-- she provides us with catchy melodies, clean lyrics, and a myriad of topics on the human heart (maybe that's why she's a millionaire ;). It's because of her that my kids and I have had great conversations about girls who wear short skirts, about Romeo asking Daddy's permission before proposing, and about why that mean person really is so mean.
Bubba didn't participate much in this particular conversation. By the third chorus, he called out, "Mommy, can we listen to a BOY song?" At the red light, I snapped this pic. I guess even a 2 year-old boy can recognize an angry-chick song when he hears it. ;)

What I Wore in Italy

40 days, 40 different outfits, 1 suitcase, $250.
My $250 total is spread out over 4 years of purchasing, so there are some definite repeats of items, but not of combinations. How I put them together and accessorize makes them seem new again. 

Like our many travels, we went not as vacationers, but lived practically day-to-day; so while I wanted my wardrobe to be stylish, it also had to be functional. Here goes:

I started by choosing a color pallet for the summer--teal, apricot, black, white. Cardigans, accessories, and shoes were all streamlined to go with any combination. Varying shades of these colors along with the all-matching denim created interest. (Ignore my blue umbrella which I borrowed.)  ;) My tried-and-true apricot pants, are my highest cost item at $40. If you've been following my blog, you've seen them before.

The weather in Bologna shifted from 55 degrees when we arrived to 100 degrees when we left. Layers were key. I bought this sling purse as soon as I arrived for €7. At first a fun accessory purchase, it quickly became a necessity and you'll see it in almost every photo. This tissue-weight flowy tank is from the Bologna H&M, €5.

I did not entertain my Spring Break rule of "not buying new clothing". Hello, this is Europe! I purposefully tucked away some spending $$ and saved space in my suitcase for acquiring new items, such as this scarf that I found at a Florence market for €4 (Euro). I stuck with my rules of "within the color pallet," and rules or no rules, I am always frugal. ;)

Good thing we packed light! Our apartment (built before any man-made structure in America ever existed!) had no closets, so our belongings had to fit in this antique wardrobe. Once again, my apricot pants proved to be a good investment, not a trendy whim.

 Here's my airport outfit--comfy and I can remove the scarf (or cover up with it) depending on the temp inside the plane cabin. Each person in our 5-member family brought only 2 pair of shoes--1 in the bag, one on our feet. Europeans walk everywhere, so our shoes needed to be comfortable, supportive, and also match everything. These metallic criss-cross sandals were a gem of a find at DSW for $30 (Note: I did not include shoes or accessories in my wardrobe cost).

This trip to the park was the last time I wore these draw-string waist jeans ($19.99, Forever21). I really thought I'd wear them more, but the weather got hot fast, and I found myself wanting shorts!

This grey dress I found at Ross for $7. It's layered under the teal sweater, which is from Papaya outlet, $17. This day spent walking on campus required my Volatile black flip flops; they are supportive and save my back, legs, and feet. I wore Volatile exclusively during all 3 pregnancies! I have to be honest, I really don't care for this style anymore. At first, I had more stylish shoes packed, but I knew that once we were walking miles each day, I would care less about fashion and more about comfort. I am SO GLAD I chose wisely!

Here is my fave white crochet cardi ($12, Ross), which was a key piece in my Spring Break wardrobe as well. It fancies up any outfit, and when I add this flower (99 cents, Forever21), my ponytail doesn't seem so plain.

A chilly, foggy morning of market shopping required leggings and a thicker sweater. I consider neutral colored leggings and tank tops as basic as underwear. A good $5 investment, 3 years ago! (Forever21)

$8 Melon tunic over basic black leggings (which I've also had for 3 years. Walmart, $3), and basic black tank (H&M, $4).

Two other ways I wore it--scarfed and with a knotted black belt.

My daughter said, "Mommy, you look very American today--red, white & blue." :) Denim dress and red belt I got for FREE when I traded in a few old articles of clothing at Plato's Closet. This belt is the only piece not in the color pallet, but it didn't take up much room to pack and allowed for a little variance away from teal/apricot/black. {Ok, I just love this pic of us in front a mural at The University of Bologna, the oldest university in the world! Founded 1088. Copernicus studied there. Incredible!}

Picnic at the park in the same comfy dress, black leggings (and the knotted black belt is covered by my arm).

Jump back! I'm wearing the denim dress under this long flowing skirt and Natasha here didn't realize it was the same piece of clothing! This skirt I've had for 4 years. I bought it for $15 on the clearance rack of a little boutique near my home.

On the left, didn't take a pic that day. :) On the right, Long skirt with ruffle tank, $11, Papaya outlet. I like the accent of color from my turquoise earrings. My little Sweet Pea didn't want to pose for this picture. She also did not want to be left out of it, so she wasn't happy either way. Don't we all have those days? ;)

Here at St. Peter's Basilica, we had to have our knees covered as well as our shoulders. It was a hot day in Rome (further South than Bologna). I wore my scarf as a wrap while we were inside places requiring no-show-shoulders, and outdoors, I wore just my basic black tank, so I'm counting this as two outfits. This flowy skirt was less hot than jeans. Again my Volatile shoes for miles of walking.

Teal dress, $17, Target. Same crochet cardi and leggings. This chaise was in our bedroom in Bologna. Karl and I thought this pose would be silly.

 My mom bought this thick cardigan for me. She found it on the Old Navy clearance rack, $3.97. Pictured here I am grinning ear to ear as my year-long hunt for vintage boots has ended. And to find them made of genuine Italian leather at a boutique in Bologna = SO FUN!

Here are the boots!!! --worn to our cultural exchange where we taught our Italian friends how to Texas line dance! Teal dress also worn with walking shoes on a hike, and lastly layered under the American Eagle tank, $5, which was cinched with a belt.

So like I said earlier, it was getting HOT in Italy. I previously thought I would make it through with just my dresses, but really wanted shorts for walking. Let me tell ya, it's hard to find shorts this season in a modest length. These H&M green twill shorts, €14, were a life-saver!

 Green shorts, 3 more ways. Forgot to mention the details of this 3/4-length shirt. Forever 21, $9.

I also purchased these skorts in Bologna for €14. They are thin with a stretchy waist. Need I spell out C-O-M-F-O-R-T! Tucked in the ruffle tank and neutral cami.

I wore the skorts lower on my hips for a romper-look. The blue beads were my grandma's. :)

So we had a bit of a laundry-problem while there--when the weather turned hot, the water started to smell a little (well reek actually), and our laundry would sour before it could dry. This day I was out of clean shirts that were for warm weather, so my friend Caitlin (in the previous picture) loaned me her salmon t-shirt. Part of my color pallet, it paired nicely with the skorts. Just one more reason why it's more fun to travel with friends!

Pink skirt, Target clearance, $6 (and it came with this turquoise belt!).

Over the denim dress! Almost exact replica of an outfit I had pinned on Pinterest.

Last piece: Black and white striped dress, last year as a gift with a Forever21 gift card, $20. I LOVE this dress!

Peplum black cardi, Target clearance, last year, $6.

On a cold day with teal sweater + black leggings. 2nd pic = Clunky belt and wrap bracelet makes it less classic and more trendy.

Last airport. On the return flight. The jacket I found at the "Temporary Store" in Rome (think close-out) for a whopping €9. And my glasses at H&M for...what was it? €4 or €5, after my other ones broke. Honestly, I'm kinda glad they did, these are super fun! 

One last outfit....
I saw this gorgeous long flowing white dress in a store front, which reminded me of Marisa Tomei's dress in "Only You" (a movie that my teenage bff and I POURED over) cost €200. Uh, no way (that's the cost of my entire wardrobe!!). BUT one of our students, Madi, brought a long white dress with her. Borrowing = a big $aver!

A romantic Italian street-dining experience, Bolognese lasagna, gelato, shopping, and a long-flowing white dress = a date-night-dream-come-true!